fuck this job.com

Farewell my dear friends at fthisjob.com. March 30th took forever to get here, but my last day has finally come upon me. I will be officially free in a couple of hours.

I just wanted to take the opportunity to say goodbye to everyone who kept me company during my misery. We truly all hated our jobs together, and truth-be-told, this little electronic community of enlightened, pessimistic assholes made things just a litte easier for me. I knew I wasn't in this mess alone.

So whats next? I'm not sure. Haven't made any plans. I've refused to jump into the next cotton planatation, excuse me, cubicle job.

From craigslist.com:

Prison vs. work

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Reply to: pers-278630407@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-02-14, 9:17AM PST

Just in case you ever get these two environments mixed up, this
should make things a little bit clearer.

@ PRISON
@ WORK

1. You spend the majority of your time in a 10 X 10 cell
1. You spend the majority of your time in an 8 X 8 cubicle

2. You get three meals a day fully paid for
2. You get a break for one meal and you have to pay for it

3. You get time off for good behavior

So some girl just walked through the door, and I have a sneaky suspicion that they are interviewing her for my job. Long story short: I got fired 2 weeks ago, and theyve given me till March to find a new job.

I havent started looking for a new one yet, but shit, theyre taking the initiative arent they! Theyre taking the bull by the horns! Theyre taking ownership over their job requirements! All that corporate BS.

Look, I'm not gonna make any value judgements about this girl. But goddamn, I really hope that she does not get this job, for HER OWN SAKE.. and FOR THE SAKE OF HUMANITY. Maybe I can catch her on the way out, and give her a warning and tell her of all the nit-picky bull shit, all the mundane reporting, and all the mental anguish this stupid job will inevitably cause.. OR maybe she'll be smarter than me, and she'll excel. I hope thats the case. Either way, she's gonna be stuck in a cubicle all day. And I just can't accept that.

What the fuck. I get fired last week, but theyre giving me till March to leave. In the meanwhile, theyre giving me all this shit work to do.

Hey boss, I thought I was a shitty worker? I thought I was unproductive? I thought I didnt have the "aptitude" for this line of work? I thought my skill level was below what was required of this job? I thought I showed no enthusiasm? I thought I made others work twice as hard cuz I sucked so bad?

THEN WHY, OH FUCKING WHY are you GIVING ME WORK TO DO, YOU FUCKING PRICK?

Hahah, my fucking boss is talking to the blackberry customer service people right now cuz he doesn't know how to "activate" it. Do you see what I'm dealing with here, people? This is the same guy who couldnt figure out how to print an excel spreadsheet. That is NO exagerration, NO JOKE. He had to come ask me how to print it. It took me all of 4 seconds to do it. What a fuckin idiot loser dick prick nit-wit twat face.

My bosses LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE to talk. They just talk, and talk, and talk, about the same shit, over and over again to make themselves feel good. They trick themselves into thinking that they are actually doing something meaningful and important.

Every day I come into this godforsaken CUBE and hear The Three Stooges talkin, talkin, talkin ABOUT THE SAME SHIT. I don't know how these fools got to where they are with the amount of talk that spews out of their ugly ass grills.

Its called ACTION you dumbfucks. Talk as much as you want, but aint NUTHIN gonna change unless you fucks take some ACTION.

As many of you know, I am the victim of a pre-emptive firing. My boss tells me he wants me to leave 60 days from now. Essentially, I am a dead man walking.

Its day 2 of 60 right now, and the tension in the office is stifling. Its so humiliating knowing that you are fired, you have no chance of redeeming yourself, but yet your bosses STILL control you. Yet, that alarm clock STILL goes off at 6am. Yet, they STILL give you stupid shit to do.

Granted, I am still getting a fat paycheck.. but at the cost of my dignity? Have I just put a price on my dignity?

Obviously, my mind has mentally shut off. I no longer have any value/future here, so why should I even give 1/2 a shit?

Yup, its true. My boss just fired me. I have 60 days to find a new job. Honestly, I don't know what to think. I feel pretty bruised/abused, but for some reason, I just feel like this burden has been lifted from my shoulders.

I don't know what I'm gonna do. Look for a new job, I guess. But, I'm not really interested in being in an office all day anymore. And I'd be stupid to get myself into that situation again. so now what? I have no clue.

I'm pretty dumbfounded at the moment. I imagine it resembles the feeling of getting sucker punched.

My boss, who for some reason has powever over me, passed his final judgment. I was judged by a deusche bag. Some guy, who I will be more successful than in the end, passed his worthless judgement on me. I dont give a fuck what he thinks. Boss, I do not give a fuck what you think. Good luck working till your 75 trying to pay off that mortgage, and putting your kids through school. I sincerely hope you die at your desk, from a massive stage 9 heart attack. A violent car accident would also suffice.

Got another shitty performance review. Nice to know that busting my ass all day, and working *significantly* harder than I used to, goes completely unnoticed and unappreciated.

Not to mention, that my boss basically negatively embellished everything about me. Blew miniscule mistakes into those of massive proportions. Now the fuckin HR lady is gonna call me, and ask me whats wrong. This is AFTER, I sent her a glowing email about myself telling her much BETTER things were going. So the review is basically gonna make me look like a huge liar.

I dont care. Everything I do is not good enough. You did this wrong. You did that wrong. Gee whiz, did I do ANYTHING right?

That cookie after lunch is what did it. The short lived sugar rush and inevitable let down, gently nudged me into a peaceful slumber here in my cubicle. I was even having dreams! I don't know what I was dreaming about, but I do remember it being highly entertaining.

Then I woke up. And the nightmare began. Isin't it ironic that instead of experiencing nightmares when you sleep and awaking to escape them, we sleep to escape the nightmare of every day life. It's all backwards.

I got a good 7.5-8 hrs of sleep last night too. So its not like I was out partying. I slept early and well. And I'm STILL falling asleep.

I'm sure a handful of fthisjob.comers made the all too tired New Years Resolution of resolving to take a more positive attitude and approach towards work. I did. I really tried hard.

But yet, I still find myself here at work, somewhat bored, with a manageable amount of work to do, but without even one iota of desire to do said work. Blegh.

Do I just need to get my head out of my proverbial ass, OR is there seriously something profoundly wrong with me coming here every day?

Honestly, I feel like I need to be doing something adventurous, something thrilling, something I can dedicate every fiber of my being too.

Well, my fthisjob.com buddies, I have the next 12 days off!!!!

Fuck yeah!! I'm crusing back home tomorrow, and I am gonna RAGE for the next 12 days days.

I just wanted to wish everyone a Merry Christsmas and a Happy New Year!

I know you guys are probably wondering, so I'll answer the question, Yes, I'm drunk right now.

What am I drinking? A screwdriver baby!

Anyway, I'm gonna enjoy the evening.

I love you guys!

I feel compelled to post.

I was so ticked off and scatter brained at work today that I accomplished virtually nothing. It was all fine and good at the time, until the day came to an end and my boss asked for this report. I didn't have it done, so now I have to be in the office at 6 or 7 AM to finish this report and do a good job on it. Fuck. Me. In. The. Ass. With. No. Vaseline.

Yep, I think I'll go slit my wrists now.

Its funny the way the last couple of days have played out. Had an awesome weekend when my bro/sis came to visit. Was totally relaxed. Wasn't on my meds! And I try to ride the positive vibes out med-free. Well, today's Tuesday, day 2 without meds, and I feel like my life has fallen back apart again. I'll take the meds tomorrow morning, I'll get to work at 6 am, I'll write a good enough report, and I'll do just enough for my sedentary/stagnant lifestyle to continue. This has been the virtual cycle for the last 10 months.

Wake up.

Blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah.blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah.blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah.blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah.

Go home.

Followed by traditional forms of self-medication.

I don't believe it. I finally found what I am passionate about.

I am passionate about.... drum roll please..

HATING MY JOB.

This isint even a joke. My criteria for determing what I am passionate about was simply the question:

If there was a club in college dedicated to one thing, and you felt passionate enough and capable enough to be the president of that club, to fight for that club, to stand up for that club, what club would that be?

It would undoubtedly be the "I Hate My Job Club."

I'm sure there are people out there who hate their jobs as much as I do. But I seem to derive some perverse pleasure from hating it so much. I relish my hatred for it. I love coming on here and posting. I love talking to myself at home about how much I hate it. I love talking to my friends about it. In other words, I passionately HATE my job. Its a never ending fury of hatred, with the flame of hate and disgust growing with each boring, mind numbing, passing day of work.

Have you ever been so bored at work that it feels like you are losing your mind?

I swear to God, I am losing my fucking mind. Man, just waiting for that alarm clock to go off in the morning, knowing that the misery will begin. You don't experience normal counsciousness while you sleep, but coupled with that, you dont experience TIME either. So when you wake up, you have not got any real relief from the dread you felt just 8 hrs ago. Cuz u fell asleep, and u woke up. And now youre fucked.

As you can see, I am bored out of mind.

Sure. Ive got some spreadsheets to reformat, some documents to read, some phone calls to make, and some initiative to take, BUT, and that is one very large BUT, I have no fucking desire or motivation to do these fucking CLERICAL OFFICE TASKS. I have become the human manifestation of Microsoft Fucking Office!