fuck this job.com

It's been awhile since I updated but its the same old game at work. Sarah the Retard takes off as much damn time as she wants and then harasses the rest of us when she's here. In the past few months those of us in the office have had to endure:

1. Her leaving to play tennis again. Its not so bad that she's gone but her babbling of "wish me good luck!" and "I'm going to be a tennis pro!" just gets old. Oh, and "wish me good luck" is Sarah-talk for "buy me some shit."

2. Her parents bought another house. We had to listen to her tell us in detail about her "new house" and how much fun her "second house" will be. She also asked us to "wish her good luck on her new house" and starting whining that she "needs new house presents." You're not getting shit from me, bitch.

She came back from vacation (again) because the rules don't apply to her and she can take as much time off as she wants. We had to listen to her babbling nonsense about "resort cups," "soaring," and "matching totebags" and other things that didn't make a lick of sense.

Then...she had a fit. She discovered that in her absence we had a little lunch party. OH NO! We did something while the queen was away? Heavens no! She had a bit of a babbling and fussing fit over the party and then notes were written. Oh, the notes. I didn't get one this time but a few others did. They were the usual completely incoherant nonsense.

I found her at my desk ruffling through my things and trying to get into my email. No words. Just snapped a few camera phone pictures. When I got them, I walked closer and she ran off babbling to herself. Then she went and wrote me a note. It was a crazy rambling apology telling me that she was going to be good so she can still go to Disney World.

I'm writing a formal complaint to HR now. It's not going to go to Bleeding Mary either. Its going to her supervisor. I'm done dealing with this shit.

Well she is being her usual crazy self and annoying all of us daily when she's here. Her parents keep her home when they want because we're just babysitters. Next week she's going to Disneyworld. That's 7 weeks of vacation she's taken so far this year.

She's been more babbly than usual since she found out she's going to Disney. She keeps babbling about her "resort mug" and her "ice cold water." She also says that she "deserves" this vacation.

Lately she's also been trying to get into other people's email and desks. I caught her sitting at my desk once and she ran away screaming and giggling.

So Sarah the Retard has been her usual insane self lately. Her little notes keep appearing on people's desks and she babbles about her life when we're not all babysitting her. Mary from HR hassled a few of us about "being sensitive to other's feelings." I don't know what she wants us to do with this bit of wisdom but I'd really like to cram it up her ass.

I really hate that they haven't addressed Sarah's problem with going through other people's desks. I screamed at her this week because I caught her redhanded. I complained to HR but nothing was done. Thanks, Mary. I'll remember that when I'm "being sensitive to other's feelings."

The retard is now scribbling notes to us when she's mad. I wish I had a scanner so everyone could see her crazy babblings in her own handwriting. She left one on my desk last week that said "Jessie (Last Name) won't give me low carb smoothies she's being mean and I need low carb smoothies and the Louis Vitton so I can go on a cruise in 2007."

You're right, bitch. I'm done letting you eat my food all the damn time. You make money. Use it to buy the smoothies!!!

I also heard from one of the people who work near HR but aren't part of that whole bullshit mess that the higher ups in said department are really getting sick of the bitch's parents taking her out of work whenever they want to travel. "Taking her out of work" sounds like they're "taking her out of day care." But we all knew that's what they're using us for anyway.

A bunch of us went out to lunch this week after enduring another day of "I want my cruise in 2007" and "I want Louis Vitton" crazy shit. We brainstormed some solutions to our problem.

Problem: When she's on the rag she stinks like a used maxi pad.
Solution: One of the gals will leave her a bottle of douche on her desk. Ten dollars says she tries to drink it.

Problem: She babbles about shit constantly.
Solution: This week at lunch a bunch of us decided to increase her vocabulary. Soon we'll have her saying "cunt" and "twat" at the end of every sentence.

Problem: She's a spoiled fucking brat.

Since she does nothing anyway I guess management sees it fit to just let her travel with her rich parents whenever she wants. This week she's ice skating. Just a few weeks ago it was tennis. The reality that people go to work to WORK has not set in with these people. Nope, just drop the brat off when they want to be rid of her and those of us at the office will babysit! And, if we aren't "nice" enough you can bet we'll hear about it.

To top off the insult of this bitch running off whenever she feels like it, she kept asking people to "give her (insert current desire here) to wish her good luck."

The bitch was a mess this week and I didn't want to know what her problem was even though she wrote nearly a half dozen hate letters and printed them. I grabbed a few off the printer like I always do but now instead of laughing at them and just tossing them, I'm keeping a file. I don't care if she's retarded or mentally handicapped or whatever the politically correct term is, I'm fucking sick of her and these bullshit letters.

I'm sick of seeing names (and she always uses full names) of people that she sees as "mean" to her. But "mean" to her is someone not letting her have something she wants. And she wants EVERYTHING. Oh, and she's whining about "not going on a cruise until 2007" as well.

This past week all Sarah the Retard has been babbling about is her upcoming Special Olympics Tennis bullshit. She kept saying "get me (insert item here) to wish me good luck!" ALL FUCKING WEEK. Anything she saw that she didn't have she'd whine "get me it to wish me good luck!"

I had just about had it with her whining and begging for shit that at lunch when she wanted me to give her some girl scout cookies I said, "You can't eat these. They'll make you fat and then you can't play tennis."

She got very upset and went and banged out another hate letter. I grabbed it before she made it to the printer. Read on for some crazy ass ramblings of Sarah's...

Today Sarah the Retard came in blathering about her next trip. See, because her parents only use the office as a day care, she comes and goes as she pleases. Summer vacation for 15 days? Sure. A week to go play tennis? Sure. Another week for something else? No problem!

Most people get TWO WEEKS and they have to be approved and all that bullshit. Not Sarah. Since she's a charity case, the rules don't apply. Whenever she wants time off, she's free to take it. I suppose we should all be thrilled when she's not around but its bullshit that we're just babysitting when it's easy for the parents.

Sarah the retard bangs these off when she's angry or otherwise annoyed. Here's one I grabbed off the printer before she got to it. Remember the only reason she has a computer is so she doesn't throw a fit because everyone else does.

Typos and grammar errors are hers...

I am so mad because I wanted a time turner like harry potter so I could go back in time and I wanted a new tennis skirt because I need a new one and I want a purse like my sister in laws that's shiny but in black but I didn't get these because people are mean and its not right because I want them I like the Olympics but Michelle Kwan didn't skate and that makes me sad because she's not skating and theres lots of sking on tv and I want to go hilton head to play tennis and Daddy says I can so I will but Daddy says we cant go on vacation until fall of 2007 and I want to go on a cruise now.

Today the Retard came in babbling about "getting goodies" for Valentines Day. She managed to actually get some filing done as she talked to herself about her "sweetheart" and her "goodies."

Anyway, by about 1pm, most of us had flowers on our desks from our husbands/boyfriends. It was at this point that Sarah got ansty. She started whining that she didn't have any flowers and that "her sweetheart" forgot her.

Awhile later, it became a catrostrophic event for her. Fed up with the ordeal, I plucked two roses from my dozen and gave them to her. I thought this would settle her down. It didn't. She started whining that everyone else had MORE flowers than she did.

The retard came in on Monday and was quite upset. See, last Friday was "Birthday Friday" where we get one cake for the whole office to celebrate all the birthdays in the month. Sarah the Retard was out on Friday (thank God) but the moment she came in, she started fussing that we "had Birthday Friday without her and it was her turn." (ie: she has a Feb birthday)

Obviously, she did no work as she babbled to herself about people "being mean" and "taking away her fun things." After about 20 minutes of this crap, her supervisor appeared and told her to get to work. Sarah yelled that "she'd wear her princess dress" tomorrow. The entire day went like that--constant, annoying babbling about her "missing fun things" and "princess dresses" and her "deserving fun."

Sarah, the retard our office babysits so her affluent mother can spend her days at a the spa, has an obsession with her water cup. She will take a few sips, then go to the cooler, refill it to the top, and repeat this ritual about ten times an hour.

Today the water cooler was empty.
All hell broke loose.

Sarah flipped out, screaming that she was going to "die of thirst." She tried waving her magic wand at the cooler to get it to refill but that didn't work. She chugged the water in her cup and then threw it at the new gal "Amy" who is the unfortunate soul that has to sit next to her.