fuck this job.com

All of you know the drill, you go to hotjobs/monster/corporate page/satan to check out job opportunities and get carpal tunnel syndrome on your mouse hand from clicking "apply to this job". So you get the usual bullshit email confirmations with that lovely postscript "please do not reply to this email. this email address is unattended and will not be seen" or some equivalent bullshit.

So then you decide "okay, I'll go to the company's webpage and see if I can get some contact info for HR." So of course you click on "careers" and get all sorts of options to click on! My favorites are:

-Look at how diverse our workforce is!
-Check out our campus recruiting schedule!
-See how a career at our company can be right for you!
-Search our available positions!

Unfortunately, the one that would be my favorite- "talk to an HR person about your application"- is the one that is NEVER FUCKING THERE! So then you try the "contact us" only to have your email client spontaneously open and populate the "to:" box with genericnamethatwillnevergetreadinyourlifetime@corporatewebpage.com.

What the fuck is up with these stupid HR bitches? How the hell am I supposed to get any feedback about why I wasn't selected? Perhaps they didnt like the way I worded some of my experience. Perhaps they wanted me to focus on something else. Since I havent been actively looking for a position in about 3 years I am not up to speed on the latest trends in what looks good on a CV, and "build a winning resume" websites often have vague information or the contradict each other. So I keep wondering "what am I doing wrong?" Thanks to these fucking elitist HR people who are so fucking better than you that they wont give you the time of day with an email address or contact phone number, I'll never know.

In a similar vein, is it me or has every fucking corporate website taken down any information that could let you bypass HR in an effort to get a job? Things in my field would be so much easier if you could because I have yet to meet an HR person who, when it comes to ANYTHING even REMOTELY technical, knows their elbow from their asshole. For example, I applied to who knows how many hardware support positions. I could do this job in my sleep, and have education/work experience credentials to show that I am well qualified. But, I'm sure some dumb HR bitch saw my CV and said "uh oh! they dont have an A+ cert, and the manager of hardware support said to look for an A+. What a shame I'm too fucking stupid to realize his his degree in mathematics with minor in computer engineering and year of experience maintaining a network and its hardware is more than equivalent to a Microsoft A+ cert, but then again, that's why I had to settle for a degree in HR! Well it was either that or psychology. Oh well, time to put this CV in the reject pile! Now let me see... hmmm... this other person here doesn't have an A+ either, but it seems they have 'soft skills'. Lets forward this one."

So, to every HR person (and everyone involved with employing people for that matter) who think they are so much better than everyone else that they can treat candidates like shit, remember this: The day is coming soon when the economy is going to rage, and when it does, you will be OUR bitches. Believe me, my way of saying "thank you" for what I'm going through now is going to be blowing off all of your offers except for the one that is going to pay double what the position would pay now, and I'll be sure to include at the bottom of my "I will consider your offer" emails the line "this email address is not maintained. responses to this email address to not be read". Bitches.