fuck this job.com

MY MOVIE

Genre: Horror

Title: The Scary Tales of Customer Service

Ahhhh...back to world of (if this were the movie trailer there'd be a dramatic pause right here as you wait for a monster of some sort to pop out at you from the screen) ....Dunh dunh dunh - Face-to-face customer service! (Insert the monster part here, but instead of a monster it's a screaming old lady who's shaking her cane every which way.)

Opening Credits and Theme Song

Ookie (Picture of me with the Why-Are-These-People-So-Stupid? Look on my face), as Stressed Customer Service Worker

Mrs. Jones (Close up of her reddening face with her blue-tinted hair), as Disgruntled Elderly Customer #1

Mr. Smith (Zoom in of his bad combover with a pissed-off look on his face), as Disgruntled Elderly Customer #2

Mrs. Morris (Close up of scummy middle-aged woman), as Manager's-butt-kissing customer

Here's the story,
Of a pathetic lady,
Had to go back to her job that's pretty bad,
Didn't really have a choice,
She needed money,
And the idiots make her mad.

(Well that last line wasn't working well for me, so that'll have to do.)

(Imagine a bad Wonder Years Voiceover here)
I thought I had escaped. No more screaming old hags, or people whining about the fact they got overcharged 10 cents... Or so I thought. But no, other things in my life make it so I can't get any normal decent job to work around my hours, and therefore must return to the (freaky music here with a long echo effect on the following words) Land of Hell!

Fellow coworkers who don't want to do their jobs and try to make you look bad so they "don't have to deal with it," raving lunatics who'd be better of in a padded cell than complaining about the fact that the cashier "doesn't know how to do her job" and better yet, those who insist that other workers in this store "have ALWAYS done this for me (yet they never know who it was), you don't know what you're doing - you must be new." Like hell. Worked here five+ long years of misery and I don't know what I'm doing? I guess that's why they kept me so damn long - maybe so I fit in with the other lazy idiots in this place. Sheesh.

..Intermission...Please Stay Tuned