fuck this job.com

2006 came and went...I can hardly believe it. So much has happened for me and to me this year I seriously feel as though I've been stretched to the limit. Next year, I just want to RELAX.

And in order to do that, I need to take back control. I feel as if everything is just spiralling out of my grasp and having a shitty work situation isn't making it any better.

I think while I try to dig myself out of the job hole, I need to pay some more attention to my personal/social life. I've been thinking, that for 40 hours during the week, I work at a place I find to be very spiritually and mentally taxing.

Considering that there are 168 hours a week, that leaves 128 hours of personal time. Note I said PERSONAL not FREE time. In about another week, the semester will end. And until the 2nd week of January, it won't begin and I won't have to worry about spending 6 hours a week in class after getting out of work *shudder* So now, until then that makes 122 hours of personal time. Count time for school work, studying, and stuff, that takes off about another 8 hours (thats being generous)a week. Now I'm down to 114.

Commuting time to work and school each week takes another 8 hours total. 106 hours.

Sleeping. 6 hours a night on weeknights, if I'm lucky and able to fall asleep not worrying myself into some soul-sucking, mind-destroying, tension-ridden half sleep. 100 hours.

100 hours. That leaves 100 hours to myself. Now does it make sense that those 40 hours I work do so much damage psychologically that it ruins the other 100 hours I choose to do ANYTHING I WANT with?!

I need to take control and spend those extra 100 hours not only planning/trying to escape, but being more sociable. Going out. Meeting new people in social settings. I think I've gotten stuck in a rut and let a shitty work situation kill the best pieces of my personality.

I think by doing more with those 100 hours of free time per week, I can keep myself going until I break these chains of misery...how ironic is it that 40 hours of misery financially allows me to enjoy 100 hours of free time, and close to 40 hours of time to advance myself/education, BUT mentally it makes it so much more taxing to function.

I just need to stop worrying about work when I'm not at work. And to stop giving a fuck while I'm at work. For God's sake, something must be done. Life should not be like this.