fuck this job.com

I just about gave up on this website- I figured what the fuck, nothing ever changes- why bother writing about it- but then again- I had the fucking twat bitch start her shit again and I'm thinking it's just a matter of time before I get the shove- seems when I stand up for myself is when I get shoved out of a job and then I spend months looking again- hopeful that I will find the right job and be happy for the next 10 years.. (nah) The bitch started uyp with me a few nights ago, giving all her mates 25 min.

The security guard at my job is making me feel insecure. When he first started talking to me, he was acting pretty nice (actually, pretty flirtatious). However, a few days later he calls me dumb (some people are so full of themselves!)

Ever since you heard me talk dirty (jokingly) to one of the guys, you've taken this as an invitation to start asking all the guys there about their sex life and flirting with them.

It's okay when me or the other girls do it because we're 20, but you're 60 YEARS OLD!! It's CREEPY. STOP IT.

I work at this place and there are three old ladies there that don't like me. So they like to watch me and report every little thing I do to the manager.

So the other day, my manager pulled me aside to talk to me about my problems.
- I talk too much
- I lie on my time card
- I take long breaks

So I told her that they do the same shit, and so does everyone else. It's just that I don't report it because it doesn't concern me. Then she told me that I have to report these things or otherwise, I'll be the only one that looks bad.

Guess what? The store is going to hire another worthless piece of shit they call a specialist! He starts Monday-though he'll be in training for about a week before he's out on the salesfloor. The two they already have are beginning to sweat- gee, fuck me out of money (and promotion) but you won't be able to screw this guy around. I'm looking forward to seeing three of them now fight for file folders like wolves over a scrap of carrion..

Well, the anger is gone. It took a Friday night and drinking myself to obvilion to get it to go.. Woke up the next morning no memory of the night before-still though the truth of Monday is there. No point of anger-it's useless. I'm going to the doctors in a few weeks time to be evaluated for depression. Perhaps all of this shite has been on my account-maybe I'm just a whinger-maybe I should have learned long ago to suck it up (even though it tastes like reguratated shit) and get on with it.

I thought today on my walk to work-that it could be quite possible that I would walk right past the bigbastardbox and just keep going- past the strip malls, out into the barren corn fields-past the quiet empty houses in the middle of nowhere-just keep walking.. Ah, a dream. My feet work on their own without any knowledge from my brain-just as vacant as the fields. While there is no thought-my body knows it's place-it is exhausted and resigned before it even begins the motions of another worthless day.

Cough Cough, that's what I hear this week in this hell. This is totally the company's fault. About 2 years ago, they took away sick days. More specifically, they rolled sick days in with vacation days and called them PTO days (Paid Time Off). So before there specific days set aside for sickness and specifically time allocated for vacation. Two different things right? Not any more! They're one in the same.

Loving it, if it's not a feeling of total exhaustion-that leaves me feeling like I can sleep for a week- it's a feeling of extreme tightness throughout my body-that keeps me shaking and twitching like some bug in it's death throes. GREAT day yesterday-gathering garbage from the aisles, lifting closet organizers and fighting to get them into proper locations, along with boxes of tile. Several trips to the returns desk-pushing carts-replacing price signs..

You know, I'm giving up the whole dream that even at the age I'm at- I can still do something meaningful with my life. That I can make money and be successful and be relatively happy. That I can really take any situation and work it to my advantage. The reality is I will work at shit jobs until Death. Beginning to believe there is no such thing as hell because I've been in it most of my life so anything after this has to be easier and less painful. Not going to off myself, too damn chicken- I'm doing it the Kurt Vonnegut way.

There are basically 2 kinds of companies. The first type is the company that doesn't give a shit whether its employees are miserable or happy. In their minds, the employees are getting paid and that's all that matters. So the employees should just be happy happy happy! They should STFU and do their work until it's time to go home. Oh and they must not whine about putting in extra time either. This company provides only the very basic benefits (if any benefits at all), has an uncomfortable, unhealthy work environment and is full of, yeah, miserable people.

I have worked in my job since 1999. It was supposed to be a short term job until I could find something better. Haha, joke's on me. Every time I think of that statement about starting out here, I get depressed.

The sad thing is that I've been looking for work since about 2004 (on and off) and have found nothing that can match the salary here. And the salary here is still less than I was making prior to 1999. The salary is ok, but not great if you know what I mean.

NATURAL GAS. Let's breathe in gas all during our shift and even when more than one customer notices it- and complains- it's written off with an "OK". Let's look off into the distance and watch the 'shimmers' of the fumes. Let's be lied to and told the utilities company was called and it's really 'OK". (Can I use my lighter then indoors and see how many asswipes I can take out with myself?) Let's not have the heaters work so you have to work in gloves/scarf/maybe yer coat because it's so damn cold? But hey, I guess they think with the gas leak if it's warm you might fall asleep- hey- if it's cold and yer breathing gas you'll stay up longer.

Oh what fun it is to open or close- never a midshift. How thoughtful of the head cashier to move my lunch up an hour since she wants to go to lunch with her 'posse'-so even though I've been in since 6 am and I'm starving, I can wait. (She's such a fat cow she could afford to go without some meals once in awhile Great that I was LIED to about the position I was given and how now I run from pillar to post filling in for shitheads that can't manage to get to work at all-nice that the bitch that makes my life hell is still making it hell.. Headcashiers are quitting left and right- cashiers requesting to leave-what's wrong with this picture?

Well she got me out, the fucking bitchcunt-who's so fucking racist against anyone thats not so fucking ghettofabulous..ya bitch, so what? I'm on fucking self checkout-it's boring as shit-but I still get PAID you BITCH. I now don't have to deal with your ass or you lazy cunt friends who don't work either- THANKS- I APPRECIATE IT. Feel sorry for the next poor white girl that doesn't fit yer image to start- you'll screw her too in the end..hopefully she will complain and some day management will learn you are a total fucking racist bitch who should go back to fucking McDonald's where you fucking came from..